COLUMNS / BILLY MASTERS

George Michael Gets Sick, Thomas Jane is 'Hung' and more...
Billy Masters
12/6/2011

“That was the best kiss I have ever had. It was deep, it was intense and it was a long time coming.” —Jason Segel talks about the on-screen kiss he shared with Paul Rudd on Saturday Night Live, which included, dare I say, licking.

I recently zipped to NYC to see some shows and catch up with some friends. Aside from running into Zachary Quinto on the street (he says hi to you all) and having lunch with former porn star Jack Ryan (ditto), my trip was spent in the theater, starting with a special reading of Matthew Lombardo’s Tea at Five, directed by Rob Ruggiero and starring Charles Busch—three of my favorite people. To make it even better, my date was the dashing attorney-to-the-stars Mark Sendroff. My adoration for Charles is well-documented, but it went up a few notches that night. I’d never seen him play a real person before—at least not for what amounts to an extended monologue. His grasp on Katherine Hepburn’s every nuance in various stages of her life is extraordinary. The team worked hard to trim the play down to a tight single act and, judging from the response, it was a hit! Also on hand were folks like the divine Julie Halston and my new best friend Hunter Ryan Herdlicka, who I almost sent to the emergency room—but that’s another story. Oodles of money was raised for the Ali Forney Center, which is a safe haven for homeless LGBT youths in NYC. Congrats!

Meanwhile, a story was breaking near my hometown. This concerns Kevin Hogan, who is an English teacher at a Malden, Mass., charter school that was named one of the best high schools in the country by Newsweek. He’s also head of the English department as well as—I almost hate to say this—the coach for the crew team. So you know what’s coming, right? Well, you’re wrong. No one got touched in a locker room. But it was discovered that Mr. Hogan also goes by the name Hytch Cawke—a name that really only works if you say it aloud, and even then it’s kinda stupid. Hytch has appeared in three gay pornos—Fetish World 1, Just Gone Gay 8 (are we up to eight already?) and Ass Fucked by a DILF 2. In case you’re wondering, he is one of the DILFs. This story was uncovered by a FOX reporter in Boston named Mike Beaudet (how he came across these gay porns is one of those unsolved mysteries). Beaudet confronted Kevin/Hytch in one of those ambush-style interviews usually reserved for presidential candidates accused of philandering or corporate heads who spill oil on pelicans! Hogan repeatedly said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

The revelation led the school to place Hogan on paid leave while they investigate. Intriguingly, response to the report has not been particularly favorable. According to the local FOX affiliate, viewer feedback has been split 80/20—with 80 percent against the station (there’s no differentiation between being against the style of the report or the nature of the story). Because you know I’m a stickler for research, I tracked down some of Hytch’s work. Let me share a detail no one else has brought up—aside from being shaved within an inch of his life, his penis has a Prince Albert piercing. And while the movie I watched employed the use of a condom, at a certain point it disappeared! That may have happened when his erection began to subside—if you look inside his partner, it might still be there! Or perhaps you’ll spy it when you watch the video on BillyMasters.com.

I’m sure you’ve all heard that George Michael is hospitalized in Vienna with what is being called “severe community acquired pneumonia.” Which begs the question, who could George have acquired this from? Earlier this month he was rumored to be dating both a hairdresser and porn star. First we got photos of George stepping out with celebrity hairstylist Fadi Fawaz, who was born in Lebanon, raised in Austria and works in London. These photos were taken in Venice—which makes this a very international item. Days later, we got snaps of George on the balcony of the Hotel Danieli in Venice with someone who looked like a porn star who appeared in Match Maker for Cazzo Studios in Berlin under the name Isaac Mazar. Since I doubt this is a name that appears on a birth certificate on either side of the Brandenburg Gate, I did a bit more digging and discovered that Fadi Fawaz and Isaac Mazar are one and the same! We don’t really know if this is a tryst, a fling or a full-out affaire de coeur, as they’d say in French—a language I’m using solely to show off my multilingual skills. But I can tell you that Isaac shows off his anal-lingual skills in his porno flick. It’s a real penetrating performance, which I’m sure helped seal the deal with Georgie. We’ll share the photos and video over at BillyMasters.com.

My favorite part of the holiday season is “Billy’s Holiday Gift Giving Suggestions,” where I share some gifts suitable for fans of this column. Kicking off this holiday season, we’re recommending two items that can be given together or separately. Back in 2000, Dustin Lance Black got the chance to write and direct his first feature film. The result was The Journey of Jared Price, which is a tantalizing glimpse at the work he’d do later and has the feel of a gay indie after-school special. It also contains more than a bit of nudity, and who’d complain about that? Corey Spears as “Jared” gives a genuine and nuanced performance. More recently, he shared another side of himself in a collection of poetry entitled P-Town Diaries. This chronicles a summer where Spears loved, lost and lived. While both of these products are lovely on their own, taken as a pair they have even more substance. I’d suggest heading to Amazon.com where you can not only pick them up, but even watch Jared Price online.

Our “Ask Billy” question comes from Randy in Washington, D.C.: “I need you to settle a bet. My friend says Thomas Jane went full-frontal nude on Hung. I’m sure I’d remember that. Who wins?”

If Thomas Jane is naked, we all win. Up until recently, the answer would be that you win this bet. But it’s entirely possible that your friend is slightly psychic. For the benefit of the readers, this question was sent on Oct. 16. On the episode of Hung that aired on Oct. 23, we did indeed get a glimpse of Thomas Jane’s nether regions. In one role-playing scene, he’s wearing a jock strap. After he takes it off, the camera pulls back to reveal a good—oh, I’d say, four inches of a rather plump penis dangling betwixt his legs. From the looks of it, that was only the beginning. See for yourself on BillyMasters.com.

When FOX viewers are on the side of a gay porn star, it’s definitely time for me to end yet another column. But first, let’s quickly send out congrats to my buddies Christopher Sieber and Kevin Burrows on their Thanksgiving NYC nuptials. For all the best stories around, check out BillyMasters.com, where you will also find my more personal revelations in Billy’s Boudoir. And, like the real-life thing, my online boudoir is open to anyone at any time. If you’ve got a question, send it along to Billy@BillyMasters.com and I promise to get back to you before we find out how hung Thomas Jane really is! Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s Bible.


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