(Bryan Singer)

HOLLYWOOD’S LEADING SCANDAL

I’m sure by now you’ve all heard about filmmaker Bryan Singer and the accusations against him. It’s a tawdry tale of greed, corruption, lust ... and Seann William Scott. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

In 1999, Michael Egan was 17. He claims he was lured into a world of alcohol, drugs and gay sex by Marc Collins-Rector. If that name sounds familiar, it’s because he was the chairman of Digital Entertainment Network, a proposed gay internet site that would stream videos to subscribers. Collins-Rector was jailed in 2004 for luring minors across state lines for sexual acts. On the entertainment side, the only product to come from this multi-million dollar organization was Chad’s World, an embarrassing web series depicting wealthy older men coming to the rescue of young gay boys. It was virtually a how-to guide for pedophiles of means. It also featured a very young Seann William Scott, which opens many other questions.

Anyway, Egan claims that Collins-Rector hired him, gave him gifts, took him on trips and promised to introduce him to the rich and powerful in Hollywood. Egan claims that Collins-Rector facilitated a meeting with Singer at the DEN estate in Encino, Calif. The complaint’s scintillating prose details skinny-dipping, butt-grabbing, lap-sitting, forced masturbation, underage drinking and oral sex without consent. And that’s just the beginning. If Chad’s World had been half as titillating, DEN might have succeeded.

Allegedly, Egan was violated on numerous occasions. In fact, his mother claims to have filed a report with the LAPD and the FBI in 1999—a claim that has yet to be substantiated. In most states the statute of limitations has already expired, though not in Hawaii. According to the suit, Egan was flown to Kailua, Hawaii, to stay at the Paul Mitchell estate in 1999. (Sigh, now they’re dragging poor Paul Mitchell into this.)

Egan claims that Singer made him inhale cocaine. After that, Singer again forced him to have both oral and anal sex, because someone high on cocaine has such a reliable memory. Please don’t think I’m minimizing the plausibility of this. It all could be true, except Singer states he was actually in Toronto shooting X-Men on the dates of the alleged Hawaii abuse.

Singer’s lawyer promises to file a countersuit with a claim for malicious prosecution. It should be added that Egan is being represented by Jeff Herman, the same attorney who represented several of the accusers in the Kevin “Elmo” Clash lawsuit. Herman said, “This is the first of many cases I will be filing to give these victims a voice and to expose the issue,” and he meant it. Egan’s attorney has since named three other Hollywood execs in the suit—Garth Ancier, David Neuman and Gary Goddard.

DOUBLE TAKE

Jimmy Fallon recently did a tandem interview with the acting Evans brothers (as opposed to those hot rugby-playing Evans brothers). Chris Evans was the one actually being interviewed by Fallon, but Scott Evans came out to play “The Siblingwed Game,” a strangely titled spin on The Newlywed Game starring siblings, although I believe the shows are identical in certain counties in Alabama!

Despite the enjoyment of watching the brothers interact in a delightfully silly way (we’ll post the entire clip online), I was struck by something unexpected. In many ways, Scott is the cuter brother! I know, I was shocked too! It’s a hard gig being the brother of Captain America, to say nothing of the Human Torch! And I’m not even a leg man, but you really must check out Scott’s thighs. You can then compare them to those nude snaps we have of him on BillyMasters.com.

A FESTIVAL FOR THE ENTIRE FAMILY

Do you know what happened last month? It was Japan’s annual Penis Festival. How on Earth have I missed it all these years? On the first Sunday in April, thousands of people celebrate Kanamara Matsuri, which translates loosely to “Festival of the Steel Phallus.” There’s even a parade, kinda like in Italy where they carry statues of saints through the streets during various feasts. In Kawasaki, the people carry a gigantic pink penis down the street, children suck on penis-shaped lollipops, eat penis-shaped desserts and play with penis-shaped balloons (otherwise known as inflated condoms).

It’s said that this tradition was started by prostitutes praying to be saved from sexually transmitted diseases during the 17th century, but some people believe the tradition is even older. There’s a legend of a sharp-toothed demon that hid inside the vagina of a young woman. On her wedding night, the demon castrated two young men. (Why two men had access to this woman’s vagina on her wedding night is one of those mysteries I’m sure got lost in translation.) The woman wanted to avoid castrating anyone else and asked a blacksmith to make her a steel phallus to break the demon’s teeth. I guess having a toothless demon living inside her vagina wasn’t much of an issue for horny Japanese men.

SIGNED, SEALED, DELIVERED

The United States Post Office is poised to release the Harvey Milk stamp on May 22, which is not only Harvey Milk Day but would also be the activist’s 84th birthday. The USPS made one major change in the stamp since it was first announced—it will be a Forever stamp. Buy as many as you can, because you can use them forever—or at least until the USPS goes bankrupt!

As luck would have it, the Finnish postal service has approved a series of three stamps commemorating Tom of Finland. The artist, noted for homoeroticism, will be celebrated with an exhibit at Finland’s Postal Museum called Sealed with a Secret: Correspondence of Tom of Finland.

When you can buy gay erotica at the post office (at least in Finland), it’s definitely time to end yet another column. Of course, you can find all the erotica you can handle at BillyMasters.com, the site that puts out. If you have a question for me, send it along to [email protected] I promise to get back to you before a demon hiding in a vagina bites off my penis (as if). Until next time, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.